Bad Reasons For Staying With A Cheater

Your man cheated on you. You have decided to stay with him. This would be fine if you were staying for the right reasons. Have you really thought this through to the very last detail? Basically the majority of the your reasons for staying with your man are hogwash:

You have always had a partner. You are one of those women that has always had a boyfriend ever since high school. You've always been a part of a couple. Quite frankly, you never learned how to be a person. Your identity and self worth are all tied up with your cheating unfaithful man. If you are married with children, some of this has been shared with your children. You do not need this man to be worthy. How is he going to validate you when he is not worthy himself? Find another reason!

Your cheating unfaithful man is the breadwinner. Some would say that this is a very good reason to stay with your man. You don't have an income. Although this may be the case now, you can always learn a skill that will give you income. Also, there is such a thing as alimony. The scary thing is that the woman is the one that gives up her standard of living after a divorce. However, you can change this. Find a way to get an income or continue to be unhappy with your cheating unfaithful man. Find another reason!

You are staying for the children's sake. A lot of people would agree with you. You have to think about the children's well being and change of lifestyle. However, if there is a lot of tension in the household anyway, it may be better to leave. They are probably just as stressed out as you are. This was a noble reason, but no cigar!

You still love him. You will always love him. He probably still loves you. However, he is a cheater that makes your life miserable. Unless he is willing to stop and regain your trust, love does not count. Move on! You need another reason!

You think that he will change. This could very well be a possibility. Do you really want to stick around for another 5 or 10 years and wait for something that may never happen? Within those years of waiting you could have found a new love and moved on. He may not have always been a cheating unfaithful man, but there isn't any proof that he will change for the better. Find a valid reason for staying!

You know that he won't change, but you know that he still loves you deep down inside. is this working for you? You know, this is just another form of being in denial about your cheating unfaithful man. It sounds like you have bought into that lie about "Men will cheat, but they know where home is." Don't fall for this silly type of thinking. Of course he knows where home is. If you believe this, he also knows that he can get away with this behavior forever. This is possibly your worst reason for staying!

If these are the only reasons that you are staying with your man, then they are not good enough. Although staying for the children might be understandable. You should always be mindful of the children. Do not let this stop you from living the life that you deserve. Leave your cheating unfaithful man now if you can't find any good solid reasons to stay.


W R Haven said...

Welcome....You will get through this!

Anonymous said...

This one site has given me the strength to do what I've been putting off for years. Thank you.

W R Haven said...

Hello Anonymous,

I am so glad you stopped by. I understand that sometimes you just want to get information from another perspective.

I am glad that I was able to help you make the best decision for your particular situation.

I hope that all is going well for you.

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